Mumbai
is a crazy melting pot; intense, pungent and chaotic with more people lying in the street than I've ever seen. Vibrant colours and loud horns, there is construction, consumerism, starvation and blurred lines everywhere. The excess in bureaucracy in formalities are equally balanced with the lack of it in the informal. There is something for everyone, whether it be gourmet or scraps, the trick is knowing the right price!
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| The Gateway to India - tourist & tout centra |
I found the journey through Mumbai highlighted all the worst parts of myself. After a surprisingly smooth entry from a calm, quiet airport into a taxi ride filled with all the excitement of a new place I arrived at a low quality hotel and reality kicked in. I felt scared, nervous, self conscious, frustrated, agitated and totally distrusting of anyone. Not long after stepping into the streets I became sweaty and smelly with greasy hair and a greasy face, the 30 degree heat became 36 and I was hot but not looking so! Suddenly stereotyped into this white woman who every beggar and seller on the street saw as money, all my outer toughness began to evaporate through pure tiredness of the heat and constant questions. For those who know the Iron Lady in me, here I became soft and pliable, like an infant in new surroundings wanting but not wanting to call its mummy.
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| The colourful and distinctive cabs! |
I came here to learn more about myself, to get greater ‘courage of conviction’ for what I want to do in life as opposed to what I feel like I am supposed to do. Instead in the last few days its like life has shown me a mirror of all the characteristics I had hidden in London; to not only look at but be confronted by elements that I had glossed over or smoothed away with pleasantries, diplomacy and intelligence, a trickery of my own mind on myself. And now I am taken out of the situation where all my social and emotional crutches are, I am forced to deal with them - fears, faults and all – the idealised version I’d like to think I am, of a well seasoned, well adjusted character, does not exist. There are elements of Morocco and Brazil that I see here but it is more intense due to the high numbers of people that seem to be scattered and fitting into every area.
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| A Hare Krishna Temple |
In my tourist adventures over the last few days I have visited, among other things, a Jain temple, the Mosque in the sea, a Shiva temple and a Krishna temple. With all these different faiths and gods I continue to wonder what is it about idolatry or idealised beings that we seem to continue to aspire towards. I question whether it is not enough to deal with, to want to and to work towards, being the best version of ourselves... do we really need something unattainable to show us the path? I do not think so.
It got me thinking that while I read books and articles with lofty ideals my real inspiration for living is all of you. The conversations I’ve had with you about all manner of topics, conversations make me think differently and inspire me to be a better person. Whether it is about the importance of compassion and personal values; or that combining spiritual aspirations with day to day work adds greater passion to the work in our lives; or about small powerful and influential groups that shape the world we live in... It is these conversations had, often over food for aide discussion and digestion that make me think, wanting to improve myself and my situation. Wanting things that we don't have is perhaps part of human nature, and especially here in the stark contrast between rich and poor. Perhaps we have all we need in the company and discussion with those around, which could lead to a more satisfying life than on the gamble of chances... I’d love to hear examples of conversations that made you think differently.
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| 'Who wants to be a Millionaire' and Street dwellers |
Mumbai is a city of chaotic beauty if you know where to look and have the right frame of mind. It was overwhelming as a first stop into India but I think to do it again I'd go with someone else, preferably a guy, or atleast make sure I can stay with someone I know.
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| Sunset on Chowpatty beach |
I have now vacated the city and am settled in a small town called Aurangabad to visit the ancient caves of Ellora and Ajanta...
